Schedules!

A friend posed a question on her blog that has given me a lot of fodder for my ruminating and I have wanted to have a worthwhile response since I first read it.  (I'm guessing it was a year ago!)  She asked how we organized our days and she shared her daily schedule with her children.  

I have tried and failed many time to have some kind of set schedule for the days I spend with my children at home.  But, through some inspiration and through some great examples from siblings we have wanted to emulate, we finally came up with something that works for our kids.  So, at long last I am sharing and it is surely more meaningful to me than to anyone else.  But, ah! To feel a sense of accomplishment!

Closing Circles  

This has been the great epiphany!  Unfortunately, it is not an original idea of mine.  I was given a book called "Project Organization" by Marie Ricks, which I highly recommend.  She talked about how we open circles continually--like cooking breakfast, putting in a load of laundry, etc.--and suggested that closing those circles is a key to organization.  Cleaning up the kitchen, following through with the laundry until is is all put away.  I am a master at opening circles, multi-tasking my breakfast, laundry, and oh! a sewing project.  With little children, the distractions that come regularly and my own propensity to open too many circles kept me from getting them all closed.  And Marie is right, having circles to close from the day (or days) before is depressing!  I challenged myself to close each circle (and to open fewer of them) before bed each night.  The clutter that was always driving me crazy disappeared and I felt like I had a lot more time to deep clean.  (Since I am pregnant and "nesting," this has felt wonderful!)

Zones

We were inspired by some of the families of Peter's siblings who seemed to have children who helped cheerfully with household chores.  Our children are old enough to help with quite a few things, we decided, and so we picked their brain for their ideas.  The first great idea we instituted was assigning zones to the girls.  The magic of doing this with our girls now is that they love to feel "big" and feel like they are helping.  

Climbing the Ladder 

The second idea we copied was an idea for a privileges ladder.  My husband works with "emotionally disturbed" teenagers at the junior high and said that the key to getting compliance is simple.  Just figure out what they want and work out a system for them.  When they meet reasonable expectations, they can work their way to earning those privileges.  For our girls, feeling like they get to stay up "later" after their usual bed time is highly motivating!  It usually takes us 10 to 15 minutes to play a game of Candy Land or their fairy tale story card game.  This is the highest rung on the ladder.  They also have lower grades of privileges, like computer time, play dough time (I don't get it out much because of the mess but they love it!) and coloring time--down the ladder in that order.  They will get to go ice skating or roller skating if they can stay at the top level for a whole week.  They get bumped down for any number of things--whining (especially about not liking dinner), fighting, talking back, etc.  The only way to move up is to do a quiet act of service beyond their jobs that they can't tell anyone about.  They have to wait for us to find out--you can imagine their "subtle" ways to hinting around for us to find out what they  have done.  And, they have to have completed all of thier jobs list to be at the top, too.  This has been like a miracle in our home! 

I just printed out a chart one regular paper and stuck it on the fridge.  Peter's brother's family has a nice board that theirs is mounted on.  How simple!

The Four Morning Jobs

I was frustrated about nagging the girls constantly to do the simple things they need to do to be ready for the day.  So I made a little song about their four morning jobs.  "Get dressed, make beds, brush  hair, brush teeth."  Even Annie gets excited and runs down the hall, wanting to be like her big sisters and have jobs to do!  Even when they're safely at the top of the ladder, the satisfaction the girls have felt from serving others often spills over as they try to sneak around and do other people's jobs before they can notice (especially the making beds one).  I've also heard the vacuum running in the other part of the house and smiled to realize someone is trying to do some service.  

The Day to Day

Most days look pretty much the same.  We don't have to nag in the mornings anymore.  I make a breakfast for everyone (no more restaurant-style orders for mom!) and they know to get going on their jobs when they're done.  They also know to ask to be excused and clear their spots (anything to stay on that top level!)  When they want to do something fun, we just go to their job charts to see if they've earned it.  Each girl is expected to do their homework (for Carissa, this is usually some reading practice since she is pre-school age).  They have to have their rooms cleaned and their zones cleaned and they each have a laundry day.  Obviously, they need help with this, but it is a motivation for them to make sure it happens.  They are learning to close their own circles and they are feeling how satisfying it is.  The greatest benefit that I have enjoyed was something I didn't expect:  our relationship with the girls has improved drastically.  We feel grateful for older siblings who have had some practice and experience and we are glad to be able to copy their ideas!  Well, if you read this to the end, I think I should bring you plate of cookies!